Great Expectations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good morning,

HAPPY NEW YEAR’S EVE!!!!!!!

I have been thinking about this past year and for me it’s been pretty good. I have spent time with the people that love me. I am blessed just to have them in my life. I have been able to do things that I never thought I would be able to do. I have accomplished several things that I wanted to do. My highs have outweighed my lows so what more could a girl ask for? I do not have much to complain about in my life. The things that do bother me I meditate on to stay focused because I know that it will all change. It always does. Anywhoo…. I was thinking about New Year’s resolutions. For the last couple of years my resolution has been to be happy. Now that may not seem like a big deal but think about all of the mini storms that you go through and have to fight to get back to happy. This year my resolution will be to continue to be happy all the time AND to spread more JOY.  Lately, I have been talking about how we have to be the change we want to see in the world. I know that may seem like a lot because the world is big. I know I always think, “How can I change the whole world?” and I never have an answer. Well, back to my movie of the week….. In Facing the Giants the coach tells his team, “Nehemiah had the task of building a stone wall around his city for protection but he didn’t have enough people, resources, or time…. but because each person worked on the stone wall that was in front of their house they got it done in record time.” That is what we have to do. We can be better if we work on everything around us. From your home to your job I need you to spread joy and encouragement so that no one ever feels alone or unworthy. Everything that is happening to this world is a cry for help and it’s up to us to listen. There are many flags that we ignore and then we pop off when something happens. Well….. What do you expect????? We need to focus on the stones right in front of us and then make it mandatory that whomever we are helping pass it on to the next. There will be no point in just taking care of you and your family because the pain is coming from outside sources. We should expect better and then take the time to influence others to be the same. So…… in 2013 let's make an effort to be happier and spread JOY. I have learned that if you see people that never speak just keep saying “Good morning” and eventually they will say it back. I expect you to be happy and you should always expect me to smile and speak to you. Let’s be great this year!

I hope that every one of you have an awesome 2012 close and a super awesome 2013 beginning!!!!!!

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

Facing the Giants......

Good morning all,

Last night I fell asleep on the couch (not uncommon) while watching Ghostbusters. I woke up to this movie called “Facing the Giants”. Normally I just get up and go to bed but I couldn’t move because of what one of the actors was saying. This older gentleman walked in to this coach’s office, read him a scripture from the Bible, and then walked out. Well the coach followed him and asked him if he really thought that GOD was not through with him. The man said yes. The coach said he had been praying but wasn’t sure if he was being heard. The man then said, “There were two farmers that prayed for rain but only one went out and prepared his field for rain….who do you think got the rain?”……

That was so powerful to me. GOD does things on his own time. If we are not prepared then we shouldn’t blame him. If you pray then you shouldn’t worry you should get ready. Why pray if you do not believe that GOD will make it happen? It’s because doubt creeps in and tells you that “it” may not happen….and you believe it. I have doubts but as soon as they creep in, I instantly start speaking all of the positive words I can think of. I also tell my doubt why I don’t believe it. It slowly slinks away….

When you have doubt, it will keep you from moving towards any goal that you desire. One of the players (a captain) on the team kept verbalizing his doubts about the team being able to win. So, the coach told him to the “Death Crawl”. For those who do not know what the “Death Crawl” is (I know I didn’t) it’s when two players are back to back but one of them is on all fours and the other player is holding on to the shoulder pads with his legs bent in the air. The player has to crawl on his hands and feet while carrying the other player…..OUCH! The coach told him to crawl from the end zone to the 50-yard line and then he put a blind fold on the player. The player said that he could not do it and coach told him he could. So, he started and after a while, the player started to complain about how it hurt and his arms are burning. The coach kept telling him that he could do it and to give him a little more. The player asked if he had made it to the 20-yard line but the coach kept yelling at him to keep going. The player kept saying that he wasn’t going to make it and the coach kept saying not to give up on him. Towards the end, the coach told him to give him a few more steps and then he started counting down the last steps and encouraging him. When the player made it to the last step he collapsed. The coach took of the blind fold and showed him that he had made it into the other end zone. The coach told him that he just carried a 140-pound man across a field. The player that had been carried corrected the coach by saying that he was 160 lbs. The coach just looked at the collapsed player and asked him if he was with him and the player said yes.

The point of all of this is that life is going to be heavy but we have to keep pushing. There will be times of pain and burning but if, you have blind Faith you can do anything! Nothing can hold you back but yourself. You never really know how strong you are until you are put into an uncomfortable position. You have to keep pushing through. That is why We Walk By Faith and not by Sight. You can’t always believe what the world is showing you because it can all change in the blink of an eye. When we allow people and society to place labels on us we are holding ourselves back from greatness. A label puts you in a box and that’s not how life works. You have to live the life that was provided for you. You will not always be able to fit into a box. When you are attempting to fit into something that is not for you it becomes uncomfortable. It’s like ill-fitting clothes. Find what works for you and keep moving! You can do more with Faith than you will ever be able to do with doubt.

Tell me what is impossible if you have GOD on your side?

Today tell your doubt that you are done. You are more than a conqueror and you are going to keep moving forward no matter what. If you keep going, GOD will keep providing a path. Stay strong and stay focused. I believe in you and I know you can do it!

AND remember if you don’t give up on GOD he won’t give up on you!

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

So whatcha gon' do?

Good morning,

You know……. It’s very hard for me to be nice to people that intentionally do things to push other’s buttons. I really have to focus on my positive to keep from falling into the pool of negativity with them.  I mean seriously, what gratification do they get in that?  It’s not as if they hurt someone and then they feel better. I think the real problem is that they are already unhappy and fear that the other person is happy without them. Stings…… People claim that they want to be happy but hurting others will not get them to where they want to be. It amazes me that instead of finding their own Joy some people will take every opportunity to bring someone else down…….

“You can catch more flies with honey than you will with vinegar”. Do you know what this means? The flies represent the things that you want in life. By using “Honey” (a.k.a Positivity), you will be able to achieve whatever you desire. People are always attracted to the happier things in life even if they are not in a happier space. When you use “Vinegar” (a.k.a Negativity), it only curls up your face and is displeasing to others…… It’s up to you on how you want your life to be. The person that you are hurting now will move on and you will be left with your anger and hurt. Is that what you really want?

Do you want to be in a happier place? Be nice. Work it out so that you have a working relationship that benefits all involved. When you let go of past pains and anger you will find that you are more open to receive the good that life has in store for you. If you do not believe me, then just keep on being mean…… you will only view life in the negative and miss your blessings. I am here to encourage you to be better because I know first-hand that if you exude positivity it will come back to you. In addition, being mean does not draw people closer to you. I will never stop encouraging us to be better. If you are lashing out at people, please stop. It’s not worth it. You are hurting you more than you are actually hurting that other person. When they are gone, you will still have nothing. For the people are being hurt by others stop giving them your power. They should be non-mofo factors to you. They do those things because they know that it will get to you. Stop. If you are having a hard time with it then fake it until you make it. Do not respond to their antics. They are just trying to draw you into their pool of negativity. It’s like crabs in a barrel…. If they are not able to reach JOY status then you won’t either. You have to be stronger and know that you can do anything that you set your mind to do.

We all have to learn to be more positive. We always complain how the world is in bad shape well…….complaining about will not make it any better. Stand up and be present in the future happiness of our world. If you a see a fellow person in pain, share some encouraging words with them. Smile at people you do not know. Say, “Good morning” to everyone you see. You never know how a few words could change someone’s day. I was at Starbuck’s in the mall and the line was super long. Well, when it was my turn the barista said, “Good morning, how are you doing today?” I replied, “I’m doing well, how are you doing this morning?” She looked at me stunned and kinda stumbled over her words saying, “I’m…good”. I asked her if she was ok and she said, “Yes, it’s just rare that someone asks me how I’m doing”. She smiled. I told her to have an awesome day and I went on my way. Even if that smile didn’t last all day at that moment, I added some JOY to her day. When we take the time to add JOY to life, it lessens any negativity that may be brewing and even make someone’s day a little easier.

We have to be the change we want to see…………..

AND remember if you are too afraid of being hurt then you will never be able to experience happiness.

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

Love the way you love me.............

Good afternoon,

Have you read the 5 Love Languages?

I have written about this before and I now I feel the need to talk about it again…… because……I can….lol…

ANYWHOO………. Everyone has a main love language. It’s the way that person receives love. Most people show love in the way that they receive love. Now this is great when the other persons’ love language is the same. When it’s not the same, there is a great chance that you will not receive the reaction that you hoped. It doesn’t mean that what you are doing is not appreciated; it’s just not that person’s primary love language.

The 5 Love Languages are (in no particular order)

1.)   Words of Affirmation

2.)  Acts of Service

3.)   Receiving Gifts

4.)  Quality Time

5.)   Physical Touch

Your love language is developed from the environment that you were raised. We all have a little of all of these inside of us but there is one that will stand out from the rest. For me my main love language is “Quality Time”. Growing up my mom was always sick. We didn’t do what other families did. There were not a lot of outside activities because the depending on the weather we could end up in the emergency room. Therefore, we spent time together doing things in the house. We watched cartoons together (the saying in my family is that my mother only had a child so that no one would talk about her for loving cartoons….lol), we played board games, art and crafts, cooking, and anything else we wanted to do. We didn’t have much money but we still had a great time anyway. Now as an adult, I require that a man will create “Quality Time” for us. With me, you never want to squeeze me in too many times because after a while I will feel that you are not interested and I will move around. I believe in the saying, “You make time for the things you want to make time for” and if it’s not me, I will leave. No hard feelings…… The love language that comes in second is “Physical touch”. Now this one can be a little tricky. I do not like a man to drape his body over me at all times or to be pulled and tugged on…. I do enjoy cuddling and light touches. I come from a family of huggers. I like to be near someone but there are times that I like to sit by myself. I am a cat….I will snuggle, move away, only to return shortly for a little more affection. I feel loved when I am hugged or kissed……randomly….lol. I wrote about this in “The truth about cats and dogs”. As for the other three languages, they are important but just not at the top. I get pleasure from someone giving me compliments. Couple that with a hug and kiss on the forehead and I feel like gold…. I probably shouldn’t be telling you guys this but how can you make me happy if you don’t know…. I like “Gifts” but some level it makes me slightly uncomfortable. If I had a choice between gifts and quality time, the quality time will win every time. Don’t get me wrong I am so appreciative when someone makes the decision to spend their money on me. It’s a very thoughtful gesture. The last one is “Acts of Service is really hard unless it’s the trash. I hate taking out the trash so anyone that does that for me has just made my day. Other than that, I have this “I can do it myself” attitude. It’s bad and I need to work on that. When people inform me that they know how to do something my first instinct is to say that I can do it also. I do not catch the clue that someone is volunteering their services. It’s best if they just come straight out and say, “Hey I can do that for you”. I know that this reaction comes from certain people telling me what I “can’t” do in the past because I am a female. It also has to do with feeling like a charity case as a child but I have gotten over that because I understand that family takes care of family. I can do anything I put my mind to but I do need to work on allowing others to help me.

The point of all of this is that when showing love be sure that you are doing it in way that person will best accept it. Using the correct love language will end up as a win, win because they will love it and you will receive the appreciation that you deserve.  If both people are fulfilled it can make for a wonderful relationship. We are not all the same so we should take the time to figure what makes that person feel loved.

If you do not know your love language, click the link below and take the test. It is free!

http://www.5lovelanguages.com/

If you would like to learn more about the love languages you can also but one of the many books.

The books are easy reads and will enlighten you on how to love the love of your life!

AND remember one of the most important things in life is how to show love and how to let it come in……

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

To tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth....

Good afternoon,

So, the questions are…..

“Do you really know who you are?”

“Do you really know what you want?”

“Are you willing to acknowledge the things that you are afraid of?”

There comes a time in your life where you will have to face your fears. Many times, you will find that your fear was unnecessary because in the end everything worked out just fine. Even if the outcome was not what you expected you when you think back it needed to end up like that so you could get to where you are now. I think the actual thought of the unknown pain is the actual fear. We have to believe that whatever it is that we will face we can get through. The mind is so powerful and we have to learn how to be in control of it. If not it will run you ragged.

I guess I will be a little vulnerable today. I mean most of you already think I am currently going through whatever I say anyway…..lol. I have a fear of being alone for the rest of my life. I don’t obsess about it because there is no indication that this will happen but being that I am 35 I’m not going to say that it doesn’t cross my mind. I don’t tell anyone these things because first of all, I am the only one that can make these thoughts go away and secondly I don’t want to hear any variations of “Oh girl it will be ok”. I understand that my family and friends care about me but that’s not really an answer. Anywhoo….. I will tell you how I control the fear. First, as I said earlier nothing has indicated that I will be alone. I am single now but that doesn’t mean that it will always be this way. Therefore, I need not trip about it.  I also tell myself that I could have still been married and since that is not what made me happy so I really can’t complain. Then I think about all of the men that I dated that I could have still been with and some I could still call but if I didn’t want them then why would I think that would make me happy now. So, really being alone is self imposed…..Hmmmm…. yeah think about it. Instead of focusing on what I think I do not have I focus on what I do have. I have a great life. I have family and friends that love me unconditionally. I have the freedom to do as I please. That means that I am in control of my own happiness. Focusing on this one little thing of being single is not adding to my happiness so I don’t. Finally, I am not alone because I date. I am alone when I want to be alone. I like that it’s easy and I am able to have a good time. There are no strings attached. When I decide that I want to go out (or if I am asked), I go not because I get a chance to be out but because I want to be out. Don’t get me wrong, I loved the institution of marriage and potentially coming home to someone I love but for me there is nothing like coming home to an empty house to do as I please. I have told you before that marriage is the hardest BEST job you will ever have but if you have the opportunity to not be on the clock take it! Fact is that when I do get married again he has to have a life of his own. We cannot be under each other every second of the day. I require Erica time. That is just me. I enjoy my quality time with myself.  I like that I can have cereal and then read a book until I fall asleep with no interruptions. Oh yeah! Sooooooooooo, when the “fear” creeps up on me, I am prepared to shut it down because I know that it’s a lie. Truth is I am blessed to have all of the experiences I’ve had because it will only make me better in the long run.

Find ways to destroy your fears with the truth….. The sooner you do the freer you will feel.

AND remember death kills you once….fear kills you repeatedly……

MAKE IT GREAT

E

Thank you.

Good afternoon,

I have many feelings today but the one that I would like to address is “Appreciation”…..

I am so thankful for all I have. I can only hope that the people I love know how much I appreciate them. I hope that I am able to show them the appreciation I have for them. I always think to myself, “It doesn’t have to be as good as it is right now so I should be happy” and I am. I have seen situations where people have it good but hold back from being happy waiting for the other shoe to drop. What if there is no other shoe to drop? What if both shoes are on securely? Waiting for the poo to hit the fan is not the way to be happy. Enjoy every moment that you have. Life is meant to enjoy and if you are spending it thinking about what could go wrong then you are wasting time. It may even end up that you ruin what you have because you are wrapped up in thinking about the end. Don’t manifest those things in your life. Really, why are you so worried anyway…. It’s not like if you make a decision and it turns out not to be right you will not be able to get out of it. Not taking any steps to possible happiness does not mean that you have dodged a bullet….it just means that you have blocked the experience. So, count it all JOY. Be grateful for all that you have. Be sure to let your loved ones know how much they mean to you. Be sure to say thank you every time you think about something someone has done for you. Give back when you can. Spread Joy and Love.

AND remember it’s your life so don’t mess it up.

MAKE IT GREAT!   

E

Oh, you boo'd up?

Good morning,

I was sitting and discussing why some people deal with other people hoping for a relationship and one of them said, “Someone will give you just enough to keep you hanging on”. We said that we stay hanging on because….. and we all said at the same time “Potential”. We give people potential to do things when they are showing no signs of making that happen. Think about it…. When someone wants something, they will take the steps to make that happen. There are times we want something sooooo bad that we will stay in the state of denial of what’s really going on around us. Then we have the audacity to be hurt when things never happen. All of the signs were there. It’s not like on Monday it was all gravy and on Tuesday it fell apart. Most times, they have already given a reason that it may not happen. We of course choose to ignore that. Excuses are made for the things that hurt our feelings because no one is perfect and “potentially” they have what we want.  So instead of letting go we stay around allowing that person the string us along….. They are not bad people but if you can get what you want without having to make any commitments then why not. You may feel like, “well I wouldn’t do that” but in actuality you have done it before. The one person that you were not really feeling but you kept them around for when you get bored. Remember them? Oh, it’s not the same because you didn’t go out with them.... Well you are not thinking of their feelings. Is it partly their fault for hanging around yes…. Just like it’s our fault for hanging on to someone that obviously does not want the same thing that we want. So….what do you do when you find yourself in this situation? I did some research and mostly it said to leave them alone or start dating others to take the thirst away…..lol. The point is…..If someone really wants to be with you then they will. If they are putting you off for some semi promised future relationship then start dating other people. Don’t miss out on a “potential” blessing waiting on….ummm… something. You are not committed or exclusively dating so date. You never know, you may come across that person that will appreciate what you have to give and find yourself in the situation you wanted all along……

AND remember let the continued growth in actions show potential………..

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

Wake up call!!!!!

Good morning,

So, I was thinking about all of the things take have been taking place in our world today and it was making me sad. We have people killing one another or killing themselves. I was telling someone that we all need to check in more with the people in our lives. I mean it can look as if a person has it all together but you never know what is happening on the inside. I know that I may not be able to change how someone feels about the world but I can be a support system in their lives so that they know that they are never alone. I want them to know that I accept them for who they are and there is no need to put on airs for me. Let's stand back to back so that you know that I have your back and will never let you fall. There will come a time that you will need to be vulnerable with someone and you need to already have that person in your corner. When you do not have someone, it will be harder to find them when you are going through it. If you do not need someone right now, it doesn't mean that someone doesn't need you. Let's be accountable for each other so that we can be the change we want see in our world. I am feeling really random with my thoughts right now.....but we need to stand up for what we are really here for. We are not here to worship material things. We are not here to live according to the rules of society. We are here to serve and right now, we are lacking. People are hurting internally and we need to take notice....Please do not think that you have to do it alone. If you stand and I stand, you are not alone. The word says, "For where two or three gather in my name....there I am".....but "We" have to gather..... Please let's work on saving our people. It’s up to us. Call, text, e-mail, or go see someone just to make sure they are in a good space. Then follow up. I know that we get busy with our lives but we need to put in our phones are calendar to stop and take a few minutes to brighten someone’s day. If we can make time for the foolishness then we can make time to stay in touch. Life is a gift and sometimes people are not able to recognize it. We have to be a reminder so that everyone is able to enjoy the blessing. Today reach out….tomorrow reach out…..continuously reach out. Love will save us all.

AND remember when you are in the midst of the storm it’s hard to see the sunshine, but an outreached hand can help bring you into the light. Take the hand.

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

Scattered Thoughts....

Good morning,

So, I was speaking with a friend this morning about encouragement. I have this theory that if someone is encouraged to be more positive then it will radiate out of that person into other aspects of their lives. Of course, this all depends on the person’s willingness to accept positivity into their lives. Their perspective on relationships, career, and self will change once they understand that your circumstances do not make you who you are. They will no longer be able to look at things through negative eyes. I was in a situation where I was encouraging someone that needed the encouragement. I did not agree with the way they were handling life decisions. The way that they were treating people was horrible. I figured that since they had so much hurt and sadness inside that they would not be able to see the good in anything. They hope for the best but always focus on the negative. I believe that if I consistently encourage then they will be able to see the good in their life and appreciate it. Then decisions can be made with a positive expectation. It’s easy to choose when your expectation is to win. With negativity comes doubt followed by the expectation of failure because that is what you know. If you want better then you have to think better. I wanted this person to know that I was holding them responsible for their happiness. I needed them to understand that I have their back and I expect greatness. Even though I got some backlash for being supportive to someone they felt didn’t deserve it I didn’t stop. First of all no one can stop me from being positive. Secondly, if I can help them make a change then I will. Finally, they don’t understand that if that person changes then they will be good to everyone. Everyone wins. I know that people can change if they want to change. If they do not want to change then it really doesn’t affect my life that much because I just gave support and encouragement…..both which I have an abundance of. I was also telling this friend that at a certain point you have the ability to make the decisions. You will not be able to blame anyone else but yourself. What happened to you as a child no longer holds true because you are an adult. YOU DECIDE. So, if you are negative and go into every situation with a negative perspective you will fail and you only have you to blame. My childhood was not perfect by any means but I make the decisions now so if I mess it up it’s on me. I have made the decision to take all of the positives in my life and grow on that. I no longer have a desire to hold on to anything negative. Why? Well mainly because those things are no longer relevant in my life. I want JOY. Now when I think something negative I have to think of two positive things in my life or about the situation. In order to keep negativity from falling out of my mouth I place GOD’s words there instead. I may not say them aloud but if I am not able to say something nice then think about a scripture or positive saying. I know that I will never be perfect but I want to be better. I want to be better to me because I deserve it. If I want to have a wonderful life then I have to make that happen right now, with what I have. For me encouragement is like adding gas to your car….. If you want to keep moving in a positive direction, you have to keep adding the positive.

AND remember correction does much, but encouragement does more.

MAKE IT GREAT

E

Who's got your back?

Good morning,

Someone asked me why am I so happy.

I told them it’s because GOD has given me the gift of life and PROMISED that it would be great. Since I trust him, I can relax knowing that someone has my best interest at heart. Then they said, “But life hasn’t always been good has it?” I answered, “Not always but most of that is due to my interference and the other is lessons that I needed to learn”. There will always be things in life that we will have to experience or endure in order to become the person that we are supposed to be. It’s like college….you have to get through it in order to reap the benefits. Trust you will be able to handle it because GOD never gives you more than you can handle. It’s you that has lack of trust in yourself. That’s why there is fear. Change your perception. When you are in a storm or in the fire just keep thinking, “There is a reason for this”. Something needs to be washed away or burned off so that you can be new again. Fight through it and count it all JOY. When I let go of the negative that is when GOD stepped in….and oh boy did HE show out. It’s as if when I opened up HE gave me everything I ever wanted. I wanted to be happy. I wanted to know my purpose. I wanted to not worry about every single thing. I wanted to understand what GOD wanted from me and to have a better relationship with him. I know that you may be tired of hearing about my divorce but I really don’t care because it was that situation that changed my life. It triggered me to let go because to me I had lost all that I thought I needed and I was still standing. Therefore, I had to let go of my old way of thinking and start anew. I am not able to even able to describe the peace that I now feel. Even in the rough moments, they are not as bad as they use to be. I now know where to put my focus in order to get back to my happy. It all started with the cross in Athena’s house (the one she won’t give me…..lol). On that cross was the scripture, 2 Corinthians 5:7. To me that cross was telling me that I cannot be influenced by what I perceived was going on at the time and I needed to focus on the expectation of something better.  I focused on GOD’s word sifting out the negative and pouring in the love. Through that one little Bible verse, I was able to open myself up to all positive things. I was able to appreciate that even though things looked bad I was super blessed. I have people that love me and will always make sure that I am safe. That alone is a major blessing. I have people that will always encourage me and for that, I can never hit rock bottom. I used that one Bible verse as a weapon against all negative. Not just my negative thoughts but I would go to battle for anyone because according to the world I should have been crushed. I should have been bitter. I should have been sad. I DECIDED that is not what I wanted. I wanted better. I was not well versed in the complete story of GOD (a.k.a The Bible) but I figured since I already believed in him it would come if my heart keep yearning for it. GUESS WHAT? Slowly but surely GOD poured in his word. I began to see how HIS word spoke to my life. It made life easier through the difficult times. GOD’s word didn’t make my life all roses it just made me understand that situations are for a moment…..we make them last for a lifetime. So, GOD then sent a wonderful woman that I do not know well to tell me that I needed to start a blog. I did and I have been able to share my positivity with you. It feels so good. That’s when I figured out the purpose of life. The purpose of life is to SERVE. Now we will all serve in different ways but we will serve. Think about it….. Police protect and SERVE, Doctors SERVE their patients, Pastors SERVE GOD….. I can go on and on. I am here to serve as a messenger for positive living. I am here to encourage because I know that in order to live the life that GOD has given us we all need cheerleaders. I do not know GOD’s complete plan for my life but I will remain open because I know his plan is better than anything that I can ever imagine…. I have the proof with the JOY in my heart. I never imagined that I could be this happy just because. Keep praying for what you want and it will be provided in the way that you can receive it. With all of this being said, LET’S live in GOD’s purpose for our lives….Be Joyful, Serve in every way you can, and keep the Faith.

If you need ever need a cheerleader I’m HERE!!!!! I have a blog, e-mail, IM, Text, or you can just call me. I AM HERE TO SERVE.

AND remember you are only as alone as you desire to be!

MAKE IT GREAT!!!!!!!

E

YOU CAN'T HAVE IT! (remix)

Good morning,

This morning I noticed that I’ve had a trying week. I say trying because with each situation that took place my initial reaction may have been negative but like I said before my JOY belongs to me. They can’t have it! Well last night was the kicker. I mean I was woke up out of my sleep for what I thought would be a pleasant situation but it was not. By the time it was all over, I was hurt and exhausted. This morning although I was no longer in extreme pain I was still bothered. On the drive to work, I was thinking, “What is going on here?” All week my emotions have been under attacked. Just when I let something go here comes something else. Letting of things is not an easy task. I would very hard keeping myself on the happy/joyful side of life. Since I have been putting in the work, I can say that there are times when I’m Joyful for no reason at all…..but please believe me it was a tough to get to this point. I had to let go of things that didn’t matter anymore. Heck I still have to do it now. I’m no longer in those situations so why do I need to hold on to it? I create my own future now so none of that other stuff matters. Things happen to us but we create who we are. We make the decisions now. So why would I add those negative things to create me? About half way to work, I said aloud “YOU CAN'T HAVE IT! MY JOY BELONGS TO ME.” If someone doesn’t like the fact that I have changed then that’s their problem not mine. I didn’t decide to be happy and see the silver lining to upset anyone. I did it for me. Plain and simple. I was tired of being sad. I was tired of everything always being negative. I have my own rocks to get out of my heart. I will not sow your negativity in my garden of life. IT’S MY GARDEN!!! Now I will be more than happy to help anyone. I will encourage and support anyone that wants to have a joy-filled life. What’s not going to happen is anyone coming and dumping their crap in my garden. No weeds, No rocks, no trash…… not in my garden. My garden will be a breeding ground for seeds of JOY so that they will sprout into a positive future. I will nurture my garden with happy words, faith, words of wisdom, and peace. I will continue to dig out any unnecessary things that are unproductive to my growth. I heard the other night, “whatever you feed will grow”. If you plant negativity then every negative word that comes out of your mouth will feed that garden. Look at your garden. What are you growing? Don’t get to the point where you can’t see the garden at all due to the weeds. Some people can’t see that they are in a different situation because the hurt of the past is blinding them. I can’t do anything about that. Your life is your life. I am only a cheerleader for anyone that may need one. I can’t live it for you. Things that hurt me in the past I had to work on letting go. It was keeping me in a negative place that I no longer desired to be. My father and I had this conversation not too long ago. I told him what’s in the past is in the past. We can’t change it but we can do is be better moving forward. I can’t sit and continue to think about what we didn’t have…. IT’S OVER! We have today so let’s not mess it up. We know better so let’s do better. Don’t let other people plant crap in your garden. Seeds of doubt, fear, pain, and anger will never be productive in your life journey. Lashing out with all of your built up hurt is not going to get you to your Joy either. Word vomit happens because you are full not because you are purging to let go. You are not changed from it. You have to make a conscious decision to make a difference in your life. No one else can do it for you. I was told that I would not be able to take everyone on the happy train with me and it hurt. I want everyone to have Joy but I am not in control of anyone but me. This week was a great example of that. I will not stop encouraging. I will not stop being a cheerleader for happy. I will not stop attempting to change every negative into a positive. I will have some not great days but please believe they will no longer outweigh my good days. This is who I am. If for some reason you are not able to handle it then step away……. I’ll be here when you return.

Your garden of life is a gift and when you clutter it with trash and weeds, it’s disrespectful to who gave it to you. LET IT GO!

AND remember do not stress over the things you cannot change because we create our tomorrow by what we do today.

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

Basic Instinct

Good afternoon!

You know……. Sometimes you know something is wrong and you do it anyway. Then when it turns out bad, you get upset. People are always going to be who they are. I’m not saying they can’t change but if you are involved with a deceptive person then they will be deceptive. If you come across a passive person then do not expect them to be anything but who they are. I have met some super joyful people and through time, they have always been that way. This is who they are…..it really has nothing to do with you. They will do this time and time again because it’s in their nature. I have said many times that you should not give people potential when they are not moving. You may know that they can be great but if they do not see it then they will be the person that they have always been. Focus on who they are in that moment and then decide if this is something that you want in your life. Do not think that you can change them or if they were in different circumstances, they would be different. You will not be able to change someone else but you can always change yourself. You have to look past how you feel about the person and see who they really are at that moment. Follow your gut and then make the decision.

The Scorpion and the Frog

One day, a scorpion looked around at the mountain where he lived and decided that he wanted a change. So, he set out on a journey through the forests and hills. He climbed over rocks and under vines and kept going until he reached a river.

The river was wide and swift, and the scorpion stopped to reconsider the situation. He couldn't see any way across. So, he ran upriver and then checked downriver, all the while thinking that he might have to turn back.

Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.

"Hello Mr. Frog!" called the scorpion across the water, "Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?"

"Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you won’t try to kill me?" asked the frog hesitantly.

"Because," the scorpion replied, "If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!"

Now this seemed to make sense to the frog. But he asked. "What about when I get close to the bank? You could still try to kill me and get back to the shore!"

"This is true," agreed the scorpion, "But then I wouldn't be able to get to the other side of the river!"

"Alright then...how do I know you won’t just wait till we get to the other side and THEN kill me?" said the frog.

"Ahh...," crooned the scorpion, "Because you see, once you've taken me to the other side of this river, I will be so grateful for your help, that it would hardly be fair to reward you with death, now would it?!"

So, the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog's back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog's soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown. He kicked strongly through the first half of the stream, his flippers paddling wildly against the current.

Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog's back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs.

"You fool!" croaked the frog, "Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?"

The scorpion shrugged, and did a little jig on the drowning frog's back.

"I could not help myself. It is my nature."

Then they both sank into the muddy waters of the swiftly flowing river.

Thoughts?

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

Decide.

Good morning,

Last night I watched Oprah’s Next Chapter with Joel Osteen. I have to say I do not know that much about Pastor Joel. What I do know is that people seem to love him. I know that he is very positive and he just seems to have good JuJu. Well last night I was inspired. It always makes me feel super happy when my thoughts about Joy, Happiness, and Peace are validated from people whom we view as important. Last night there was a clip from one of his sermons where he said, “Trouble is inevitable but misery is optional”. I LOVE IT! That’s why I am always stating that we should “Focus” on the positive because trouble will always be there. When we focus on the negative, it begins as a pebble and then snowballs into this monstrous ball of negativity. It’s really hard to feel sympathy for someone that is choosing to be miserable. I mean seriously, you are not happy until something happens to you. It never lasts because you are not full of Joy to begin with so you become a black hole that destroys anything that is given to you. Fill yourself up! Speak your greatness into existence. YOU ARE IN CONTROL so you have to be the one that changes the direction of your thoughts. Look at the things you do have going for you. Look at all of the blessings that have been given to you. Enjoy the people that are encouraging you in your life. Encourage yourself! Life is what you make it so put in the work not only in your professional life but also in your personal life. I want to give you my happiness but I can only do so much….you have to live your life. I have chosen to focus on my Joy, My Happy, and my Blessings. My good days far outweigh my not so great days and that’s what I desire for you.

AND remember it’s not about how much water is in the glass…..the fact is that you should be happy that you have water to drink.

MAKE IT GREAT

E

A Change is going to come.......

Good morning,

This morning I was thinking about Forgiveness. Someone asked, “How do you know that you have forgiven someone?” I thought about this because I guess I never really thought about it in depth. My two cents was I feel like I have forgiven someone when their name can be thrown in a conversation and my first thoughts are not negative. I mean we hold on to grudges and do not even realize that most of the time the person(s) is not even worried about you. You are holding on to something that doesn’t even matter. These last four years have been so enlightening. I am the type of person that when you break something down to me and I have understanding I can make better decisions. I am not perfect but I do see things differently. That’s why I get so excited to share things with you. When I wrote about the rocks in our hearts it made me feel good because I know that if I keep tending to my heart I will be able to forgive and get those unnecessary rocks out. Holding on to those rocks will eventually weigh you down and you will find yourself buried underneath them. I have one life to live and I plan to fill it with love, joy, and happiness. I have a few rocks but I am working on them every day. I refuse to let any rocks to get in the way of the things that need to get in to nourish and add to my growth. With that being said, to all of the people that have hurt me….. I forgive you. I wish you nothing but the best in life because that is what I want for everyone. I apologize to anyone that I may have offended or hurt. I also forgive myself for the not great things I have done or said because I am working on being better and I don’t need to hold on to that either. If GOD forgives, we should do the same. Be better and make the road ahead beautiful. I hope that we continue to grow, be positive, and support one another on this journey we call life. 

AND remember life and death lies in the power of your tongue….give life!

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

Get a shovel.......

Good afternoon,

I have so much on my mind today. Life Studies always has me thinking, thinking, thinking and today is no different. We discussed the parable of the sower. I found this scripture so power and sooooo deep. I mean we couldn’t move on because the discussion just kept going and going. We ended the conversation with the part of the parable about seeds being sowed in ground that has rocks in it. The seeds sprout but since they are not deeply rooted, the sun can come and scorch them. They were not able to get the nutrients they needed because the rocks were in the way. I thought that this was so beautiful. So a quick translation….. The seeds are the word of GOD. The ground is your heart. The rocks are things we hold on to (i.e. anger, shame, sadness, being a victim, unworthiness). The sun is any type of trial, storm, or experience. Now we are constantly getting the word of GOD. Just because it doesn’t have the word “GOD” in it doesn’t mean that it’s not a part of his word. Things like “Let it go”, “Piece be still”, and the truth shall set you free are all in the bible. I believe most people are intimidated by the bible (I know I was) and that’s why we tend to pull away from it. I have found with understanding it’s not any different from the life we are living right now. Yes,…we are not farmers but we still live by the saying, “What you put in is what you get out”.  Now…..we ALL have rocks in our heart. Some are pebbles and some are boulders. The whole point of this scripture is that we have to continue to work those stones out. Some will be easier to work out than others will but we should never give up. The more stones we work out the more open will be to the word and all positive things that come with it. That way when the “Sun” comes it will not scorch but continue to mold you into the person you are supposed to be. I have said that the storms of life are not there to destroy you. They are lessons that have to be learned and if GOD could just say, “Do this and this” and we did it then I think we wouldn’t have to go through that. Anywhoo, I put on my Facebook that when life gets funky it’s like having a rock in the groove of your shoe. We never just walk around uncomfortable talking about how you know there is a rock but you will not get it out. We immediately stop and work that rock out and then move on. I actually had a rock stuck in my tire tread (the treads are so deep J thanks Ike) and I could hear it. I pulled over and looked at every tire until I found it. Then I had to find some tools to work it out. When I got it out my truck ran so much smoother. That’s life. Continue to work on getting those negative things out of your life. It’s easier to accept the positive when there is nothing blocking it. I realized through the conversation that people tend to hold on to certain stones to remind them of how unworthy or that they should still be ashamed. The thing is that those things are gone. You are not in that same position. There is a 99% chance that you are the only person that even thinks about that situation. Stop punishing yourself for something that happened in the past. IT’S OVER AND YOU ARE STILL STANDING! It only lives because you allow it to live. Dig that stone out and place it on a shelf….. Use it as an example of how you dug it out and became better from it. You will get no trophies or awards from leaving it in your heart. Don’t be embarrassed. Let GOD use you to heal yourself and others. There is nothing like the feeling of using your victory from a past hurt to help someone else claim their victory. You are already an example of how something GREAT can come out of something not so great! LIVE IT!

We will always have to maintain our garden of life. Take care of you.

AND remember don’t let pass situations dictate future blessings

MAKE IT GREAT!

Mind-boggling

Good morning,

I have a couple of things I want to say today……I hope that it’s not too random.

I am always speaking about how to get to “Happy”. Last night I was watching “Oprah’s Next Chapter” and she (and the interviewee) said that they don’t want to be happy they want Joy. They felt that happy was not a real thing. I sat and thought about it and on some level, I have to disagree. I believe that Joy is an internal thing and because of that, you are happy. The thing is that when you do not have JOY I think happy is easier to obtain. I live on the “Fake it until you make it” plan. In the beginning, I wasn’t happy. I didn’t have JOY. Well actually, I couldn’t recognize and enjoy the JOY I did have. So, I focused on the things that made me happy. I constantly reminded myself what I did have and why I should be happy.  I worked on me and through all of that, I was able to discover my internal joy. I believe that when you are able to appreciate who you are and where you are that is JOY. Things will not always be the same because life is forever changing but if you are happy with the core of you then you will forever have JOY. It seems so easy for me to understand now. I believe that most people have a hard time because they are attempting to fit themselves into something that doesn’t really fit. You have to be able to find what works for you and work from that.  It can be difficult at times when it comes to the action but I’ll never stop because the outcome is so sweet. I spoke with someone recently that told me that although I am constantly encouraging there would be some people that I will not be able to help. That hurts me. I am very happy, joy filled, and I want everyone to feel and enjoy the same. Sometimes I wonder what GOD goes through. I mean he promises us that he has something greater than anything we could ever imagine but yet we refuse it and continue to live unhappy lives. Are we afraid? Do we really not want it? Then I think what do I do when someone doesn’t want to let go of the negativity? Do I just give up and not bother with the person? I mean I can’t force anyone to do something that they have no desire to do. Do I hang around and keep trying? The thing with that is after a while it becomes too much negativity and I get snappish. It’s one thing if the person is working through it and needs a confidant. If the person just wants to complain I am not able to deal and can come off a little too blunt. I have issues with people playing the victim and not doing anything about the situation. Things happen. Do something about it. I mean sit and think about what you want and then go after it! Sitting in a pool of pity is not attractive. People that go through hellish things and fight through it are not victims….. They are soldiers. These people still have a flicker of JOY inside of them and they want to make it a fire. We should never be defined by one thing that we have been through.   We are more than a situation. Our experiences should mold us into better people. Why would you not want to be better? Is it because you do not know ahead of time what that is? I just am not able to figure it out….I think I’m just thinking too much…..

I hope we are all able to find internal JOY. Never stop working towards it. I pray that will all be able to be “Happy” in the midst of it all.  Life is a gift so let’s take the time to enjoy every minute.

AND remember you are the author of your life story….. Will you create a best seller?

MAKE IT GREAT

E

YOU CAN'T HAVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Good morning,

Lately when I something upsets me I say, "You can’t have it”. Earlier in the week, a woman almost hit me with her car. I got upset and just as quick as I got upset I went back to my happy place. She didn’t hit me so really there was no need to be upset so I told her, “You can’t have it”. Someone at my job plucked a nerve and I told them, “You can’t have it”. I’m so real about this. MY HAPPY BELONGS TO ME AND YOU CAN’T HAVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I worked very hard to get to this place and if the devil, the evil, or negativity thinks for one minute that I am going to allow them to have they are sadly mistaken. It belongs to me! Oh and how they do try to make it hard for me to live. They attempt to put seeds of doubt into my mind but I’m not having it. This especially happens when life is in transition or when something is about to move in your life. When things are looking like a mess and nothing seems to be coming together is when it sneaks in. That is when you need to be the strongest. That’s when you need to stand up and check yourself. If you want your happy then go get it! Stop looking for it…it’s right there! Tell (aloud) the negative things in your life that they can’t have it! You want to bring the drama? Well save that for your momma because you can’t have it. People on your job trippin’ well smile and tell them you can’t have it. Your own mind trying to play tricks on you? Check’em! Until there is undisputable proof then don’t worry about it. Things in your life are not playing out fast enough….chill. Those situations can’t have your JOY! There are too many other things happening in your life that are a blessing. Too many other things in your life bring you JOY. Focus on those until the other things can be worked out. When things look funky to me, I think about Ruth. She lost her husband and two sons…. AND on top of that, she was in a famine. I mean really is your life that bad? I doubt it. Anywhoo, she was just scratching and surviving, Boaz saw her (someone is always watching out for you), and a series of events lead her to a better situation (in short). The point is that where you are RIGHT NOW is where you are supposed to be. Things will change and you need the circumstances of where you are right now so that you will be prepared for your future. SOOOOOOO with that being said, you need to be happy. Your current situation should not be in control of your happy. IT CAN’T HAVE IT!!!!!! It’s your happy. The thing is that when you do finally get to happy then all that bad is forgotten sooooo let’s get a head start. Let’s have a pre-celebration that never ends. Celebrate during the storm because you want to come out on the other side experience what extra happy feels like. This week has been super awesome for me. I have opened my eyes every morning with a layer of “extra happy” on. Nothing has happened. I just woke up happy. I am so grateful for this feeling. I think about where I have come from and I’m excited about where this life may lead me. I know that doubt and fear HATE me this week. They tried but I think they have moved on for the week. My shine has been too much for them. Oh well. I don’t know where life is going to lead but I tell you what…… I’m going to be SUPER HAPPY when I get there…. You can’t have my happy! It belongs to me!

AND remember you have a wonderful life….. It’s better to realize it sooner than later.

MAKE IT GREAT!!!!

E

It always happens in 3's................

Good afternoon,

Yesterday’s life lesson was about the “Evil Three”. The “3” showed up in Life Studies, at the end of my workday, and then last night…. The lesson appeared 3 times. If you know me, I’m all about the “3”. If I hear something three times then it has my full attention. Anywhoooo, the evil three are doubt, anxiety, and fear. We battle with them every day. I talk about them all the time. The harder we work on building a positive life the harder they work at throwing a monkey wrench in that plan. I was thinking about the three and how they affect us. Doubt affects the mind. It has you manifesting things that haven’t even happened yet. Because we almost never “assume” in the positive we create the worst-case scenarios when it comes to situations. The thing that is crazy is that most of the time there is no indication that things are not going to go in the positive direction. Doubt knows that when we have to be patient that is the best time to attack. So, doubt sends a “maybe” and has you thinking things have changed when in actuality nothing has changed. Yesterday you were not thinking about the situation and now today it’s about to fall apart. Once doubt has embedded itself in your mind, it then summons its homie anxiety. Anxiety attacks the body and has you not sleeping well, having bad dreams, uneven breathing, and sometimes a panic attack. Now your world is falling apart. Your situation is the same but you physically are falling apart. Now that doubt and anxiety are tag teaming, they bring in the closer……fear. Fear is bigger than a mind thing. Fear implants itself in your soul. Think about it when you fear something your whole being reacts to it. Again, here goes the “3’s”…. Mind, Body, and soul. The enemy is not unorganized. There is a clear plan. DESTRUCTION of your happiness is the only desire. They say for every good there is a bad. That’s why we have to stay focused. We have to find something to take our mind off the situation. Find some affirmations, groups, or hobbies to get into while we are waiting on the situation to wrap itself up. If you have done all that you were supposed to do and that’s left is to wait then I strongly suggest that you find something to occupy that time. The good is always there but the “bad” will always try to distract us from it. The “evil three” has to get it in where it fits in because no one consciously makes room for them. I know I don’t. I make every attempt to focus on the “GOOD three”.  When doubt creeps up on me, (doubt never lets you know that it’s coming) I turn my mind to the “Father”. When I focus on GOD, I am able to find the positive. If you believe in GOD then you know that HE wants what’s best for you. It’s a support system. When you are going through something and you need to vent you turn to your support system because you know that they have you best interest in mind. Well it’s the same with GOD and that’s where I go. Once my mind is on GOD I remind myself that the “Son” died for me so I’m covered. I can relax my body because my mind is not trippin’ out. It reinforces what I already know to be true. Knowing that I’m covered by GOD totally I can totally live in HIS “Holy Spirit”.  It runs all through me allowing me to stay focused and to keep moving forward. I end up being in a calm relaxing place. This may sound a little preachy but you know what it’s how I live my “BEST” life. I want to be spiritually in tune with the “GOOD Three” because I know that they will always have my back when it comes to the storms of life. Life will never stop so we must always be prepared for whatever comes our way. Doing these steps doesn’t make the storm go away but it does make you better prepared to make it through. Let go of the negative and let’s go get this better life. No more complaining…. That’s that “evil three” living. Don’t wait to hear this message two more times…… Get on it now.

AND remember the things that you pay attention to will tell you who you really are……

MAKE IT GREAT

E

Crackhead......

Good afternoon,

I’m sitting here and I’m thinking about fear. Fear comes from not having an understanding of a situation. When we don’t know either we shy away or act like a bull in a china shop. We all do it. I use to shy away from speaking about GOD. I knew some things and although I have faith, there were so many things I didn’t understand. I have been able to ask all of my questions without someone giving me the serious side eye and now I am so much more comfortable in a spiritual conversation. With better understanding, I am able to get through the storms of life. It’s not that the storms are easier…..I’m just stronger. The reason that I titled this post “Crackhead” is because we are human and we have to take life one day at a time in order not to be strung out.  The drug is fear and when we are living in fear, it will cause destruction. Fear will have you lying stealing, and cheating people. You are afraid of getting in trouble so you lie and blame someone else. You are acting shifty because you are stealing and afraid that someone may catch you. You don’t address issues because you are afraid of what it may say about you. You are afraid that you will fail so you make irrational decisions, which just cause the storm to get bigger. The thing about storms is that they always pass. Even the worse storms have come and gone. What we must do is not jump too fast in the storm. We must get into a Faith program and take it one day at a time. I have learned that when the storm is giving me the business I need to just stop. I must stop all movements and get prayed up. Focus on GOD. It’s not that I feel like I’m going to get the answer right at that moment. I just need to be centered so that when I do make a plan I will not be all over the place. When the storm comes, our initial reaction is some form of fear. We cannot let that fear drive us. Allowing fear to guide you is like letting Stevie Wonder’s evil twin take you to the store. Nothing good will come from it. Get focused on being calm and centered and then move. When GOD brought the Israelites out of Egypt, it was not so they could run around like chickens with their heads cut off. HE wanted something better for them. Now all they needed was to have Faith and stay the course. Well I am telling us….focus and stay the course. The storm will pass but will you have enough Faith to endure the journey?

And remember they say that weeping may endure for a night but JOY comes in the morning…….

MAKE IT GREAT

E

Peace..........

Good morning,

Every day I pray that we all get to a place in life that we are at peace. I know that it becomes difficult because we are human and there will always be worry. We just have to stand strong and battle through anything that comes our way. I was speaking with my Life studies group yesterday about how with understanding comes a sense of peace. People will always shy away from what they don’t understand. That is why I pray for understanding. I have a strong desire to be at peace. When I am at peace, I can handle the storms that may come my way. The storms of life are not so detrimental. With peace, I understand that I’m so much stronger than I give myself credit. I have come so far and I understand that all that I have gone through is not just for me. GOD could have used any situation to build me into the person that he wanted me to be. He used what was necessary so that I could help others that would be in need. I didn’t understand at the time but later it all made sense. I just needed to pay attention. The answers to whom we are and what we are supposed to do are all around us. Every situation is a clue and if you do not pay attention, you will miss it. The good thing is that if you miss it the clue will come back. Tune in to your talents. What is it that you are really good at? I mean what is something that comes so simple? That is the core of who you are. Once you can figure that out then you can develop that into something that you like to do. I love to talk, advise, and help their get to their happy. Your talent was given to you for a reason. In the bible when GOD wanted his temple built, he gave certain people specific talents. Well that still holds true. There are certain things that come easy for some and not so much for others. Use your talent. The happiest times in your life come from doing something that you love. That is where your peace is at…….tune in.

AND remember when you unclutter your mind you will be able to find a peace of mind….

MAKE IT GREAT

FYI….. I just want to inform you that I may not be able to send the good morning e-mails every day. I have been working on this book project and it’s getting difficult for me to have something inspiring to say while my mind is focused on this book. I am going to try to send them as often as possible but I really want to make this book a reality.  I hope you all understand. Have a wonderful day!

E