Hoarders..............

Good afternoon,

Sooooooooo I was watching Iyanla “Fix my life” yesterday and she said something that I just cannot stop thinking about. She said, “When you are broken it’s like having a crack and the broken people you allow in your life become an infection in that crack. Do you blame the crack or the infection?” Most times we blame the infection. We are quick to talk about how that person our pain. Rarely do we take ownership in the part that we played in this pain. You can’t have an infection if there is no crack. She went on to talk about “Forgiveness” and how when you forgive yourself and others then and only then can you begin to heal. I thought about who I need to forgive. First I focused on me. I forgave myself for the times that I didn’t think highly of myself and felt that I wasn’t enough. I forgave me for not separating myself from unhealthy relationships sooner than later.  I forgave me for not making the greatest decisions because of my baggage. I then moved on to my parents. I had to dig deep for my mother because she is lightweight perfect in my eyes….lol. I forgave her for not believing she was enough and the difficulty she had in believing she was a good parent. Thinking of things to forgive my father for was much easier…. Right now everything with him is still fresh.  I forgave him for not being who I needed him to be when it came to being a father and a friend. I understand that he was just not capable of that type of commitment. Once I realized that we actually were able to have a closer relationship. I forgave him for not showing me the love he had for me which in turn has me always wanting to prove my love and that I’m deserving enough of someone else’s love. I actually have forgiven most of these things already but I have never said it out loud. I take ownership of all the decisions I’ve made and because of that I can let a lot of things go. People cannot do any more than what their past experiences allow. The more you hold on to those negative experiences the more “stuff” you have to carry. Some things that happen to us are not our fault but when we hold on to that “stuff” or we don’t take ownership of our part in the situation we project that negativity on to the next person. In order to have a healthy relationship of any kind we have to forgive and let go. Forgiving is not saying you are cool with what happened it’s saying that it happened, it’s over, and in order to heal you have to let it go. Letting go is a freeing feeling. It allows you to receive any happiness that comes your way. It also keeps you from doing what was done to you. The things that people hate they actually do to others. *yeah go ahead and think about it* How does the saying go “Hurt people, hurt people” all of the things that you are afraid of or can’t stand you mostly have done or are doing to someone else. You can’t expect a different life if you are operating through past hurts that doesn’t exist anymore. Take ownership of your own “stuff”, forgive, and let go…..

Every day you wake up is a gift from GOD….. don’t let your past ruin your present.

AND remember don’t let others’ actions dictate your reactions………..

MAKE IT GREAT!

E