Chin Checkin'....

Good morning,

Some people are not able to appreciate what they have until they have lost it.

Do you ever feel like everyone has the very things that you want? Well, not everyone but many of the people that you see. I was talking about this topic with a friend. What’s so funny is that we both agreed that yes, they may have what we want but what did they have to go through to get it? What do they have to endure to keep it? When I see my friends with their families I can’t lie, I am envious. Jealous, no, because although I have a desire for a family of my own I realize that I have a great life. Yes, I’m single but that just means I come home to quiet. I can do all of the things that I love to do. I can come and leave as I please. I watch and listen to what I want. I can eat what I want. If I want to read books all day, I can without interruption. I am only accountable for me.  I never want to be in a position where my hopes and dreams override the blessings I have at this moment. The grass on my side is just as green as the other side. Perception is not always the reality. Every situation has its pros and cons. Learn to appreciate what you have. Life is always changing so it will not stay the same forever. Enjoy the moment before it’s gone.

AND remember be thankful what you have and you will end up having more…..concentrate on what you don’t have and you will never have enough.

MAKE IT GREAT!!!! 

E

You fell....not failed.....

Good afternoon,

Sometimes when you think you have failed at something you really are just being directed to go a different way. There was a lesson there to be learned. Take it and move on. Do not linger around beating yourself up about the situation. Keep moving forward. As you know, I believe everything happens for a reason. Find the silver lining in every situation and stick it in your mental file cabinet.  I like to think about the silver lining like the movie “Willie Wonka and the Chocolate factory”. Inside a few of the chocolate bars was a golden ticket. The chocolate may not have been good for you but the ticket will lead you to a better future.  Don’t focus on the chocolate …focus on the golden ticket. To fail at something does not make you a failure. A failure is someone that gives up. They no longer put forth effort. As long as you keep getting up and attempting to be better the next time then you are not a failure. I have found this to be especially true in relationships/marriages. If it all falls apart, some people feel that they are failures. If you worked for a major corporation and it went under do you go around blaming yourself for the demise of the company? Nope…. You pack up your belongings and start looking for a new gig. In a relationship/marriage, it takes TWO people to make it work. If you do not have the effort of that other person then there will be a breakdown. At that point, you can only work on being a better person for future relationships. Do not let society place labels on you. We have all failed but it has never stopped us from trying again. Be strong. Be grateful. Be happy.

We were created to be great!

AND remember never be afraid to fail….something good always comes out of it.

MAKE IT GREAT

E

Pleasantville.....

Good afternoon,

“Cause together ain’t promised forever…..let’s live in the moment” – Rihanna

In this moment, I am at peace. There is JOY in my heart and happy on my face. I understand that I will not have this life forever so I do not have time to think about the things that I believe I’m missing. I am good with what I have at this moment. Do I want more? Yes, I want more but how can I have more if I am not able to appreciate what I have at this moment. I will always strive for better but I do not want to ever forgetting how blessed I am at this very moment. I am so blessed that when I am not able to find my happy I have people in my corner that will help me get back to where I am supposed to be. There is no need for me to be sad. I let go of all of societal restrictions, people’s opinions, and past hurts. I am free to enjoy the gift of life that has been given to me. I know that because I am free I am able to serve you in your journey. I am able to encourage and cheer for you. Making your day better also helps make my day better. When you are encouraged then you will be able to encourage others. Before we know it, we have created a better place to live….and isn’t that what we all really want? The moment is now so live in it and enjoy the ride!

I hope today has been the kind of day that makes you feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside.

AND remember weeping may endure for the night but JOY will come in the morning.

MAKE IT GREAT!!!!!

E

Lose to win....

Awesome morning!!!!!

This morning I was listening to Fantasia’s new song “Lose to win”. I love this song….. “Sometimes you have to lose to win again” is so true. I know that the song is about a relationship but I believe this can be applies to all aspects of life. When a situation is just not good, you stay with the hopes that things will get better. Well if the other side is not taking the initiative to work with you to make things better then you have to let go. The situation can be a relationship, job, or friendship. Lose it so that you can achieve something better. Just because you let something go doesn’t mean that you are a failure. We have to change our perception of “Failing”. In order to be a failure you have to stop trying. Every time you stumble or fall and you get back up you are a success. In the end when you accomplish any goal you have a testimony of the work you put in to make it happen.

If you happen to be going through a storm or you feel like a failure, please realize that you are still standing. You are hurt but not ruined. Keep chipping away at the negativity and replacing it with the positive things in your life.

AND remember success is achieved by those that view failure as a hurdle and not a dead end.

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

This is why you're single.....

Good morning,

I was speaking with someone last night about “communication”. They were saying that although communication is important not everyone can’t handle bring told things about themselves and that’s why people do not communicate. I asked, “If you feel that they will not be able to handle it then you just don’t say anything?” If I have done something that annoys or upsets you then how will I stop if you never say anything? So, you are just going to live in this unhappiness because you are afraid the other person will not be able to handle you telling them something they’ve done is bothering you? They said they probably would just not deal with that person anymore. O_O I replies, “So, that’s why you are single….” They didn’t care too much for that statement. I feel like if you do not attempt to communicate and rectify the situation then you will always end up in situation like this. Communication is so important. It’s how you begin to understand a person. Communication expresses love, wants, and needs. Even if you are not the most effective communicator, you should keep trying. Practice makes perfect…..or at least better. With communication, you have to be careful how you approach people with it. If you come at person with the wrong words or tone then it is possible that you will drive them away or at least activate their defenses. When you make mistakes like this then you should attempt to reach out to make them understand where you were coming from. You should always communicate with a solution orientated goal. When I was married we went to this couples retreat. We had activity called “Knee to Knee”. (I believe I talked about this in another post)  You sit face to face and take turns talking with the other person repeating what you said to make sure they heard and understood you. This way no one has to assume the meaning of anything. I LOVE IT! I’m not into to drama so I always want to talk it out and move on. I attempt to be an effective communicator. I’m not perfect so I do make mistakes. It doesn’t mean that I will stop trying. I detest having to assume. We never assume in the positive thus potentially making a mountain out of an anthill. Now with that being said…… you will cross paths with people that decide that they have no desire to communicate with you. It can be an unfavorable situation. You want to clear some things but it seems that they have no desire to hear it. You have put forth the effort and still nothing. Well what do you do? You stop. Attempting to communicate with someone that is not receptive is like walking over to a wall and trying to make it understand your point of view. That dog just won’t hunt. This doesn’t mean that all people are the same and you should just give up trying altogether. The truth is if there are people that do not communicate you don’t want to be with them anyway. If they don’t try now then they won’t try later. Communication works for those who work at it.

Attempt to resolve some issues today using positive communication.

AND remember assumptions are the termites of relationships. Don’t just say something……Say SOMETHING. (Thanks APG)

MAKE IT GREAT!

E

The little things....​........

Great morning!!!!

There is a song by Boyz II Men called “Little Things”. I love this song because I never want to take my life for granted. The little things can be overlooked because our want for the big things seem to be taking too long. I want to appreciate every little thing that is given to me. I found that when I count the little blessings I have so much to be grateful for and that makes me smile. Now do I have everything my heart desires? No. Is everything right in my life? No. That doesn’t mean that I cannot appreciate the things I do have. I’m sure those other things will come but in the meantime I want to be happy with what I have. We all strive for a better life but do not wait until it comes to be happy. If you can’t be happy now, then why would GOD bless you with more? Please know that all of your little blessings are like puzzle pieces….once they come together they create the big picture! Be happy and focus on the happy things that you have right now….it helps you be patient for future blessings.

I hope you have the kind of that makes you laugh so hard it creates a six-pack and smile so hard that your face hurts!

AND remember happy is what you make it so…….

MAKE IT GREAT!!!!!!

E

Not Easily Broken........

Good afternoon,

Not too long ago I had a conversation with someone and they told me that they were "Broken". My first thought was, "Why would they say that?" The first thing out of my mouth was, “Never say that again because it's not true”. If you were broken you would not still be trying to achieve a wonderful life." Because I know some things about this person, I knew that they were still hurting from some experiences. So, you know the wheels in my mind started to turn. We all hurt from experiences but it's up to us to decide if we are going to let those things hold us back. I hurt for that person because I can see the pain they are going through and there is nothing I can do about it. They have to make their mind up to let go and then work on their goals. Let go of the past pain. Let go of the fear. Let go of the control. Every time we let go of something we free up space for something else awesome to enter our lives. We all have fears but we have to acknowledge them and move past them. Fear is just us trippin' on something that may or may not happen. There is no proof one way or another but because it's not happening in the time that we want we start geekin’. The older we get the more our fear grows. We feel we are running out of time and start make impulsive decisions. Then we start to become negative so just in case it doesn't happen we won't be hurt. Truth is we already setting ourselves up for failure when we do things like that. This is why I keep telling us that we have to focus on the blessings we already have. We have to speak positive things into existence. You never want to believe the negative because you put that negative vibe out in the universe and it manifests in your life. I hope that makes sense. Basically....what you put out you will receive….lol. We must believe that it will happen. I was listening to Bishop T.D. Jakes the other day and he said, "Believe ye received and ye shall have it". Meaning if you believe it in your spirit then you shall have it in the natural. It’s as if you know that you are going to get it. Heck, you can even know the confirmation number. You are just waiting for the delivery. We are human so there will be moments of doubt but you cannot live in that doubt. Have the moment and then move on...refocus and KNOW that it’s coming.

AND remember past hurts don’t mean that you are broken, it means that you were put to the test and didn’t fall apart.

MAKE IT GREAT!

E